Tuesday, March 26, 2013

five love languages

I’ve heard about the 5 Love Languages but I never read the book or looked into it more. Today, I decided to take this quiz.

Here is a screen shot of my results:

I knew without taking the quiz that I was a “Acts of Service” but taking the quiz really showed me just how much.

The man squeeze and I have been married going on 5 years and it took me about 2.5 years to really understand his love languages. He is “Words of Affirmation” and “Physical Touch. ” As you can see by my screen shot, those are my “lowest” two.

I never really took the time to appreciate knowing what the main squeeze’s Love Language was but once I figured what his were, I was able to really focus on loving him in the (for lack of a better word) right way.

The main squeeze likes for me to ask about his day and to really focus on what he is saying. He receives love in the form of praise (“I’m so proud of you” – “You did a great job!”).
I do not. If you know me, you know I’m a talker. I don’t usually have to be prompted to tell you about my day nor do I need you to give me a pat on the back.

I never really “got it.” Why on earth do I have to tell him “good job” and why do I have to probe into what he did today? I just didn’t get “Words of Affirmation.
So… I trained myself. At first, I was just rolling through the motions – (how was your day, that’s awesome, you look cute today….) I really didn’t care too much about what he was saying. Don’t judge me. At least I was trying!

After a few months of me trying, I started to notice that the main squeeze really responded in a positive way. I can’t really put into words the changes I saw but they were there.
He also loves to touch – whether it is a hug when he walks in the door or simply our legs touching in bed – he likes to be close to me.

Again, I am not. Now, don’t get me wrong – I do occasionally get the urge to hold his hand or give him a hug – but they aren’t as frequent as he would prefer.

Because “Words of Affirmation” and “Physical Touch” are his Love Languages, he also gives love in the form of them.

Which is tough. I’m not a touchy-feely person and I don’t need to hear “good job….”
I am an “Acts of Service” lover. I like to buy people gifts because the item reminded me of them, I love to cook for my family, and I will try and help anyone in any way I can. I show you I love you in very obvious ways **cough cough folding your underwear cough**

Since I give love as “Acts of Service” it only makes sense that I receive love that way. I love nothing more than coming home to a freshly vacuumed house and a clean kitchen. It makes me giddy. I love when people, and by people I mean my husband, do things without me asking them too and I especially love if they do it out of love. I hate nothing more than someone doing something nice and expecting something in return. Um no. Be nice and considerate to be nice and considerate.

I can’t express how important it is to know YOUR love language (how you give and receive love) and to know YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS love language (how they give and receive love) but to also SHOW love the way the other needs it. 

I encourage you to take the test and to dive deeper into The Five Love Languages. If you are a book reader, you can buy it here. 

No comments:

Post a Comment